What’s with today today?   Leave a comment

I admit that I am having a really hard time with this recent violence.  I keep trying to figure out just what makes me so different from everyone else.  I assume it’s everyone since only people who feel completely foreign to me tend to speak up.  Why is everyone so angry?  Why does everyone want to torture this poor kid?  I get it; he and his brother did something horrible.  I know that what they set out to do was, from the beginning, not only illegal, but violent and a major infringement on the rights of others.  And I know that people will tell me to visualize someone I love or me as a victim of such acts as a way to bring it all home as if I haven’t tried that and in that little mind game sits all of the wonderful answers.  But that’s just not it.

I am backwards.  Somehow, for some reason, when these things happen I find a way to rational and detach from the victims and find a heartfelt sorrow for the “bad guys”.  I have always done this.  Sincerely, since I was a kid and I would root for Freddy or Jason in the movies.  And it’s never left me.

And I know I sound simple and ignorant and like I’m just trying my hardest to be difficult, but if you knew just how deeply this was bothering me maybe you would be more sad for me then angry.  But then, I guess then you might understand my point to begin with if that were the case.

I just don’t know.

Regardless, this is the sort of thing that makes me worry about dealing with people.  I am always just so wrong.

Nevermind.

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